Hair

Mullet is growing out, eyebrows still look
like gigantic hairy caterpillars. Perhaps Bo
gets his from me and not Jud?

Me in Grade 6...never mind the mullet,
what is up with those eyebrows?

Horrendous. That is all I can  say.


Unfortunately I could not find my Grade Seven school photo which should really be a federal crime (maybe that's why I threw it out?). 

But picture the mulletiest mullet ever, and that's me in Gr. 7.  


If you have a daughter, do not ever, ever, ever do this to her.







23 years later and I still look at these pictures, that hair, and think w-t-f ?????? My Gr. 7 photo is so bad that I've considered entering it in Ellen's photo contest, you know the one where people send in unbelievably horrible photos of themselves, often from the eighties or early nineties. Sadly, I think I'd win.

In the history of hair, I cannot think of an uglier hairstyle than the mullet. The only people who seem to (somewhat) get away with the mullet "style" are: 

a) rock stars
b) hockey players
c) fat lesbians (ever notice how they braid the long strands?)

I was none of the above and even worse, I was in junior high. Girls in junior high are not known for their kindess, and this hairstyle did me no favors. 

It took me a couple of years but I dumped the hair stylist responsible for this monstrosity and found somebody who had an inkling of style, at least something that kept me bully-free.

It saddens me a bit that I don't have a daughter. During my pregnancies, I wondered if my baby would have thick dark hair like mine and how I'd learn to do all these funky braids and crazy styles. 

The boys do have beautiful hair. It is thick and dark, soft and shiny. The kind of hair that needs a style. I already know I'm going to be one of those moms who will take her boys to a stylist, rather than the barber, when they're older. 

But for now, la styliste, c'est moi...was me, rather. Pretty sure Bo fired me today.

We hadn't even begun yet.

Cutting boys hair is harder than it looks. The sideburns, the back of the neck, around the ears...not easy with a screaming two-year-old who sits still for, uh, zero seconds. 

My bad.

That's not a "thumbs up" for my efforts. Look closely. He's holding up part of
Hershey's kiss wrapper.

Joshua enjoyed watching though.

We experienced so much parental abuse taking William to get his hair cut that we decided we may as well save the twenty bucks and do it ourselves. It's not like it looked "perfect" anyway, not with him squirming around the chair, screaming and foaming at the mouth as we pinned him down and put his big melon in a headlock. No, it was not a pretty site.

I have learned, through my few forays into the hair cutting world, that when you accidentally take out a chunk of hair above the ear, or at the back of the neck, it is best to cut all the hair as short as possible. Had I not done this, Bo would have ended up in Dumb and Dumber territory.

So, his hair doesn't look that bad. It doesn't look that great either and his next cut will happen at a salon or at a barber's despite the likely chaos that will ensue.